Scott Hines

The Perfect Date

Tomorrow is April 25th, and the ACBN has food, drink, music, books, pets and more to make the most of it.

An Ode to the Books I Probably Won't Read

but I *meant* to!

Here Are Some Animals I Think It Would Be Cool To Be, Situationally Speaking

Food, drink, music, books, pets and more? It's Friday at the ACBN!

Great Moments in Baseball History

A backyard vignette

Some Brief Words in Praise of Winging It

A north-of-the-border Spring Break travelogue from the ACBN

It Turns Out Space Is Still Cool When You're Not Weird About It

I watched a rocket launch into space while sitting in a Skyline Chili. That sounds so personally on-brand as to be a joke, but it's not. This Wednesday, my son and I got haircuts, and our tradition is to adjourn to the Ohio Valley's finest regional

Here Are the Only Pranks That Are Acceptable In These Post-Satire Times

You can't just go filling cars with stuff anymore. We live in a society.

"And we're underway..."

Baseball season is here, and I'm celebrating with BBQ, porch drinks, a good book and more. It's Friday!

You Think You're Better Than Me?

An open letter from a Bradford Pear tree

What's in an (online) name?

Spring is here, but more importantly: it's Friday. Let the ACBN guide you in.

You simply cannot make international sports suck

Many have tried! PLUS: the reddest cocktail on record, emo?, geography lessons and HOT DOGS. It's Friday!